Make dating apps work for you

Dating sites and apps began to gain popularity during the nineties. And alongside the rapid development of the Internet, they gained worldwide popularity. Online dating statistics for today are as follows:

  • Every third person on the planet has met someone on the Internet at least once in their life
  • More than 8,000 online dating services operate in the world
  • About 40% of people aged 25-54 use online dating services
  • The largest audience for dating services is among residents of the United States (almost 63% have used one)
  • Around 17% of all marriages in the world today begin with online dating

At first glance, the statistics are really good. Millions of people find their soulmate online, build strong relationships and start a family. But how come for some everything goes well, as if at the snap of a finger, while others spend months and even years trying to find a mate with no luck?

After many unsuccessful attempts, some begin to blame themselves, thinking that they are not attractive and interesting enough. This isn’t the case. It’s more likely that they just make common mistakes on dating sites and apps. And you need to deal with these mistakes so that dating services finally start working for you.

How to avoid the most common dating site mistakes

Mistake # 1. Thoughtless swipes 

Many dating apps work on the principle of mutual attraction. If the user swipes to indicate that someone is interesting to them, and they in turn show an attraction, the application provides the opportunity to communicate. This scheme is good in theory. However in practice, many people swipe on everyone completely mindlessly in order to get more matches. This is just a waste of time, as you’ll just end up with a lot of matches with people that are actually completely unsuitable for you.

Tip: Think through your swipes carefully and, if possible, study the person’s profile before trying to make your acquaintance.

Mistake # 2. Inappropriate greetings and poor presentation 

Starting a conversation is the hardest part. And often further communication entirely depends on your greeting. A banal “Hello. How are you?” only irritates the other person. And lines learnt from the pickup artists on the Internet will just get a sarcastic laugh.

Tip: pay attention to a person’s unique characteristics: appearance, dress, decor, interests, etc. Find something they will definitely be interested in talking about. It can be an unusual hair color, a poster of a music group on the wall, a photo with a pet — whatever.

Mistake number 3. Trying to find a clone of yourself

This is one of the most common mistakes. Many try to find a person as similar to themselves as possible — the same interests, musical preferences, manner of dress and even speaking. This is doomed to disaster. Yes, you must have something in common, that’s understandable, but don’t turn online dating into finding your own clone.

Tip: try to stop focusing on finding your reflection in other people. It’s impossible. And anyway, many people say that opposites attract. The chances of a strong relationship are more likely with those who do not look exactly like you.

Mistake # 4. Not filling in your profile, and old or missing photos 

Some are just too lazy to fill in all the fields in their profile, while others don’t want to share their details with a large audience, and many are convinced that it isn’t at all necessary and you can get to know each other already just by chatting. This is not true. Your profile is your calling card — it is by it that you are judged. The same goes for your photo. There’s practically zero of a successful match if you don’t even have a profile picture.

Tip: fill out all the recommended fields in your dating app and don’t skimp on profile photos. Upload only recent photos, taken no more than six months ago. You may not notice changes in your own appearance even over five years, but they’re there — a photo from two or three years ago may show a completely different person. 

Mistake # 5. corresponding only via text messaging until the first real meeting

It is easy and convenient to interact via text chat. But this format of communication very rarely gives a good idea of what kind of person is in front of you, what their temperament is, their character, and so on. It often happens that the person in the chat and the one you meet are very different. And not always an improvement.

Tip: be sure to communicate not only via chat, but also by phone, and even better — by video call. You can use any suitable service for this: Skype, Zoom, WhatsApp and so on. 

What is the easiest way to eliminate these mistakes?

dating apps 2021 2

There is no single ideal for online dating and no algorithm by which you should act. But if the use of classic dating sites and apps does not give your desired results, it may be worth changing the format of online dating itself. For example, use video chats instead of dating apps.

Video chat almost completely eliminates the mistakes listed above:

  1. There are no thoughtless swipes here, the system itself selects someone for you at random or based on your specified parameters.
  2. A unique welcome phrase is easier to come up with when you meet a person. With your greeting, you can experiment and alternate different approaches.
  3. Trying to find a clone of yourself in video chat is pointless — here it is almost impossible due to the fact that the choice of chat partner is often completely random.
  4. Usually, there are no profiles and photos on video chat sites. You can immediately see what kind of person is in front of you, how they communicate and behave.
  5. Many video chat sites have a separate text chat feature. But these aren’t very popular, as everyone prefers to see the face of their chat partner.

Online video chat services have become highly usable platforms in the past few years. They have already discovered how to search for partners of the opposite gender, connect users only from the selected region, search for people by interests and many other parameters. Among the most versatile platforms are chatrandom, emeraldchat, and ome. Also, the search is much faster than in dating apps, and live video communication helps you to relax and get to know each other well in order to meet sooner offline, and take the relationship to a completely new level.

It doesn’t take much to gain dating success

We’ve covered only the basic mistakes users of dating apps make and how you can avoid them. There are other pitfalls you can face.

Any modern online dating service pushes users into a certain framework. And users by their action or inaction only narrow this, and as a result aren’t taking even half of the opportunities offered by the dating site.

The main advice we can offer is: don’t stop and don’t be afraid to experiment. If your current search strategy doesn’t work, change it. Try other dating apps and video chats, change your search settings, expand your geographic range, and so on. Somewhere there’s probably someone with whom you’ll have the perfect relationship. All that remains is to find them!